This is part of an election series with all of Bath’s Parliamentary candidates – all interviews can be found on our website. Some answers have been edited for legible clarity
Interview by Genevieve Redgrave
How and why did you want to get into politics?
I got into politics when I began to realise there was a lack of political diversity and I had so many ideas in my impressive blockhead that offered a different way forward….I wanted to play the game.
Were you ever worried that you wouldn’t be accepted , especially in this divisive climate for being a Blockhead?
No, I have never worried about it. “I am what I am, take or leave it!”
Are there any other blockheads in politics currently?
Hmmmm.. where do I start with that one?! Takes one to know one..
Your slogan is Don’t vote for Bill, he’s a Blockhead..is this a political game of reverse psychology to actually get people to vote for you?
It’s all games..politics is the biggest game show on earth!
DON’T VOTE FOR BILL…OR DO…
At the minute ,the question really is “leave or remain” but you actually want to leave something much bigger- the solar system by 2028. Can you tell us a bit more about that? And how you actually think we’d leave?
The UK land mass including Northern Ireland will be loaded onto titanium stilts . Super massive rockets fuelled by specially fermented guinea pig (or alternative small rodent) poo will launch the landmass out of the solar system. Why not leave it all behind? The leavers get the chance to do Brexit and some, the remainers can jump off the stilts if they can get a visa to remain in Europe.
What would Bath be like after we leave the solar system ?
Bath would be in a different bubble. The same tourists over and over again, just imagine that ..
Your mental health strategy, important for students, is to give furry animals on prescription..How is this going to be funded? Are you going to make guinea pig farms? Do you get free vet care?
Furry animals on prescription will be funded by selling the Royal Family and a couple of top Premiership football teams to the highest bidder.
Small Rodent welfare is my priority..Any breeding programs and housing for guinea pigs and small rodents will be of the highest quality ..using the casings of disarmed nuclear weapons as rodent runs ..there will be high quality sawdust, vegetables and feed and the latest in rodent wheels and tunnels designed by Oxbridge postgraduates.
Free vet care funded by the Police .
Your proposed plan to dig up London Road, who is going to design and maintain this garden? Is it not dangerous for citizens to have a wild growth on their doorstep? Once we leave the solar system is there a chance that all of these plants would die without any oxygen?
Gary the famous giant gerbil will design the gardens. A co operative will be set up to maintain them led by students from the University of Bath. wild growths are forbidden, they are dangerous.
Everything survives in the (privileged) Bath bubble post leaving the solar system.
Your impressive idea to reintroduce trams back to Bath built from strawberry jelly and gingerbread men…is this going to be made at local bakers from Bath or will it be imported? Will there be gingerbread women or is gender equality not a big issue for you?
A consortium of local bakers will be responsible for the baking of gingerbread products and primary school children will provide the jelly with sprinkles. I am currently in discussion for a gingerbread personage design to avoid gingerbread gender stereotyping ..I stand for equality across all the genders..
You mentioned the possibility of free summer and winter parties, can you explain a bit more about these and what you think they would look like?
Held across the public parks in Bath featuring small rodent fancy dress ( no cruelty or exploitation allowed) roller disco for guinea pig prize winners , Blockhead barn dance, eat your own weight carvery vegan and vegetarian..and a circus featuring local politicians..
What are you planning to do about affordable housing crisis in Bath?
All housing will be affordable once the UK has left the solar system.
Can you give us 3 reasons why a student in Bath should vote for you?
Here’s three questions instead to help Bath students not to vote for Bill Blockhead
1, Am I playing a game?
2 Am I to be trusted?
3 Do I answer your questions?