Dating apps are great for busy people who still want a dating life. They provide countless opportunities to meet people you’re attracted to and who you might not encounter in your everyday life. They let you find out more about a person before actually committing to a date, and, at the very least, they’re a bit of an ego boost.
I recently re-downloaded Tinder upon returning to my hometown for the holidays. Why? As well as the typical ‘to meet new people’ and ‘have some fun’ answers, I also needed a distraction from an overload of family time. I’ve had limited experience with dating apps in the past as I’m usually too busy or get bored of swiping too quickly. But with low expectations and an even lower tolerance for family games, I started swiping.
My previous experiences using Tinder were last ISB, when I visited friends at 3 different universities in one week, and last summer on my trip to Dublin. On the first occasion, I was only in each city for 3 days; this resulted in me matching with people who were either in the city I had just left or a city I was leaving soon. A terrible outcome.
The second occasion yielded slightly better results and Tinder became a good way of finding recommendations for things to do in a new city. On that trip, my friend matched with a guy who we ended up meeting one night when we’d gotten lost in Dublin and ended up in bad company. He saved us from a tricky situation and led us to a cool club that we’d never have found by ourselves- maybe not what Tinder was made for, but a pretty good result nevertheless.
My most recent Tinder venture felt like a more typical experience of the app. I had a few conversations that died quickly, a couple of really nice dates with people I doubt I’ll ever see again and one unwanted dick pic.
It was fun but it quickly started to feel like a game of speedy judgements and cheesy pickup lines…….
The biggest con is the lack of non-verbal communication that comes with all forms of online messaging. And while generally okay when talking to friends, whose typing mannerisms you’re familiar with, it is a bit more problematic when trying to gauge if a lesser known person is interested or not.
Eye contact, smiling, hand gestures and the direction of someone’s feet are all tells to whether you’re having good flanter or if the person you’re talking to is disinterested. It is also much easier to lie online, your chances of finding weirdos are higher and often, people aren’t actually looking for a serious partner.
As for myself, I seem to be having better luck in real life than online, so I’ll be hitting pause on dating apps for the indefinite future. If you’re still looking for love, do not despair, life is unpredictable, you never know who you might meet tomorrow and the love of you life might be right under your nose.
To read more about my questionable life decisions, check out my blog: