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In the Tinder Age, We Really Need Ariana’s “Thank u, Next”

If, like me, you’ve been single for over a year, then chances are you’ve downloaded tinder and had a go at swiping. When I first started it was fun – I swiped simply based on my own shallow perceptions of appearance, and went on very occasional date.

Now, though, as I have emotionally matured and feel completely ready for relationship, I have come to hate Tinder. I’ve been on far too many first dates with unwelcome groping, and even had a couple progress to a second or third only to have the most millennial mugging off: be ghosted. 

Am I stupid to think that every time I go on a first date, I could be meeting the guy I’m going to marry? Probably. Why am I so surprised when things go wrong with a guy I met on tinder? Because I’m dumb. Why am I even on Tinder? Because *Chandler Bing voice* I’m awkward and hopeless and desperate for love! 

And then, Ariana released her magical new single. It’s so brilliant that it’s my anthem on Tinder. It’s so good that I constantly sing it whenever I get sad about an ex. It’s so amazing I’m considering having the lyric ‘I’ve loved and I’ve lost’ tattooed in some sort of tribute to my tragic dating history. 

Joking aside, we need more songs like this. When I look at other female artists I struggle to find the same message of amicable breakups and self-growth, instead finding Cardi B on her third (admittedly awesome but that’s not the point) Cinderella story single and Rita Ora professing her sadness at being so incapable of allowing love, and even Little Mix, once the queens of the feminist anthem belting out a song (that is somehow different but sounds the same as all their others) about how they’re a bad girl and could you love them etc.

Ariana’s single is refreshing. Not only does it break the mold of typical manufactured pop songs, but the lyrics are happy without being shallow, and the message is so healthy. And so what I’m learning from Miss Grande: find love within yourself because you don’t need to rely on a partner for it. And maybe, just maybe, if I approach my next tinder date with this attitude, I might find love. Stay tuned.

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